Weird things guys have said to me... *seriously*
I'll let you into a secret. Girls like to share the pain of a bad date, even to the point of sending their friends excerpts of text/emails from guys. I have quite a collection of funny quotes now from girls that i'm hoping to put into some kind of published format... but until then i thought why not post a sample online too ;)
Here are a few choice one-liners that have come my way recently. I'll leave it to you to decide if its 'normal' or not:
Second Date Guy: "No honestly. I eat nails." I think i thought he meant he bit his nails but no... he actually was referring to steel nails.
Mr Talks all the time: "i used to pretend i was a wolf so i could fight with my dog" is it normal for a guy to fight with his dog? He had a lot of teeth mark scars to prove it...
The Texan : "Yeah she sleeps on my sofa and pays me in kind for rent. It works well." I honestly tried to climb out the window of the bathroom after this one.
Muscle Guy: "What do you mean by the fact that you have many brothers... is there a deeper meaning to that?" No i have a lot of brothers.
The Army Guy: "Are you also a lesbian?" Eventually worked out he wanted a threesome.
The boyfriend: "Its cave-man boy time" rii-ight. maybe after eastenders?
Mr Cool: " i like that shiny shit on your face. makes you look like an alien" i take compliments where i can get them
Industry Guy: "I was thinking of where to go. Do you like Trannie-oke?" Say again?
Sex Pest:"Can i come over and give you a massage? Purely platonic of course" It was a big fat no.
The Ex: "I re-added you back on facebook so you can see that i'm over you." Not weird but i wasn't expecting it.
Mr Part-Time Model: "Truthfully though, do you think im fat?" I now know how it feels to be a guy
The Aussie: "I've lost my headphones. Can i look in your bag incase you've taken them?" what?
Cute Bar Tender: "We have to be careful of what we say, cos you know government is hiding aliens from us" just randomly thrown in a serious conversation about taxes
First Date Only Guy: "You seem distant. Is it because i've got a coldsore?" i don't think i need to answer that...
First Date Only Guy much later:"So you're not going to have sex with me. I bought u a beer?" We ended up having this argument in the street while i was getting into a taxi to go home
First Date Only Guy much much later via text:"Whats your address. I want to make sure you get home ok" Delete, delete, delete...
Ok well thats a few i can recall. Share the love if you've had any weird boy experiences...
Love ya all
L xoxo